Volunteer Shines Through Service

by Jenevieve Andersen

“I should have been one of those women up there. I tell them, ‘The only difference between me and you is that you got caught and I didn’t.’”

By them, Monica Marks means the women she serves as a volunteer for Kairos Prison Ministry at the Hobby Unit in Marlin.

“So, I guess that’s why I’m passionate about it. And I tell them, ‘There’s no difference. I am absolutely no better than you. The Lord doesn’t love me anymore than he loves you. The only difference is I didn’t get caught. I should have, but I didn’t.’”

Marks has been open about her past struggles with substance use. She’s been sober now for over 13 years and thanks God for keeping her clean. This is what led her to volunteer with Kairos. The program has a mission to bring love and forgiveness to those incarcerated. She remembers the dark days she struggled through and recognizes that she was lucky. She was lucky she didn’t get caught, but she’s also lucky she had a support system. During some of her darkest days, she had friends and family she could lean on as well as people to help her make the right choices. Sometimes hard choices, but the right choices.

“I chose the lifestyle. These women chose the lifestyle,” Marks said. “I don’t think any of us ever stopped long enough to realize how detrimental our choices could be to our lives.”

“Sometimes we don’t understand that the smallest choices can lead to some of either the biggest breakthroughs or the biggest downfalls.”

Now Marks tries to be a beacon of light into their darkness. She knows how it feels to live in the dark.

“I could be one of them. But I saw my actions and the bad choices I was making, and I decided to choose differently,” Marks said.

She volunteers most Saturdays. “I kind of laugh now because when I’m on Highway 6 coming in and I can see that water tower way off in the back, I get excited because I know I’m bringing light to a dark place.”

“And these women are hungry for it. They’re asking us all the time, ‘When are y’all coming back?’”

As the women begin to file into the small classroom, Marks and her fellow volunteers begin clapping and welcoming each of them. They exchange greetings and hugs and catch up since the last visit. And then, they just share. They talk about life, their children, their struggles, their accomplishments, and their choices. It gives the women a chance to stand in the light.

“I think for us to go behind the walls and for those women to see that we have some of the same struggles that they have makes us more genuine in their eyes. It makes them realize why we are there,” Marks said.

“Prison can be a dark place and I want to shine a light into those dark corners and be a beacon for them. And if I can touch just one person, then I’ve done the work.”

She says she’s been repeating two letters:

“U” and “N.” Un-

Unwanted.
Unloved.
Unworthy.
Unnecessary.
Unraveled.

“You could go down the list.” That’s how she felt, and that’s how she knows these women can feel.

But she has made the choice to see her life differently “NU.” She is NEW. And she wants these women to make that same choice. Be new.

“Oh, that’s powerful. I am Worthy, and I am Wanted, and I am Loved,” she said.

Marks received the TDCJ Employee Volunteer Award during the 2022 Governor’s Criminal Justice Volunteer Service Awards ceremony for her work as a Kairos volunteer.

Kairos of Texas began their ministry in TDCJ units in the 1980s. Kairos volunteers minister to both male and female inmates in 46 units across the state.

The organization’s mission is to bring Christ’s love and forgiveness to those incarcerated and their families and to assist in the transition to become a productive and successful citizen.